So, we put this discussion off long enough. And it’s not an easy one, because we are talking about things that we know we are guilty of and must repent for all the time! We live in a culture that says that self-esteem is important but we are born of blood that says we must fix our eyes not on ourselves, but on Christ alone. They are not messages that can live side-by-side. The end result of fixing on yourself is inevitably self-destruction; the Bible tells us so. Scripture says that our inherent value is anchored in who God is, not who we are. So if you are given to despondency over your failures, fixation on your needs and desires, a lack of hope and trust in what God has promised for you, the answer is to turn outward and look to God, not inward to focus on yourself. We hope thinking through these things is yet another way to view the world, and your place in it, with lenses made from Gospel truth!

Episode Navigation

00:45 We are finally unsure if this “her” and “she” thing we do every week makes sense.

5:20 Let’s talk about self-esteem, what it is, and why it’s the worst concept ever.
9:12 Why is thinking better of your self opposite from Biblical standards? What is the spiritual consequence of self-focus?
14:30 The cure for self-loathing and self-focus is summed up in God’s law. Love God, love neighbor.
20:45 How does grace impact how we view ourselves?
26:00 Self-Loathing is not the same thing as hating your sin.
31:00 Summer’s kitchen chairs attack her and Joy has a crazy story of injuring her ankle and no one believing her.



  1. Jane

    I understand and agree with much of your message but I was taken aback by your comment that the Me Too movement is futile. I don’t believe God wants the stories that the Me Too movement is sharing to be kept in the dark. True, we are always empowered thru faith but to say that that should be enough for us to just push some terrible circumstance or situation aside and never hope for better seems….I don’t know the right word….silly, hopeless, etc? I wish you would reconsider your opinion of this movement.

  2. Sara

    A friend of mine sent me this podcast. I appreciate that you taken the time to address this topic. As it’s true, it is a big problem our society faces. And it definitely spoke to me- to not try to “increase” my value or try to look to worldly things to satisfy a sin-issue which I need to bring to God with a repentant heart. I would say that my only criticism is this podcast (and this may be my own bias because I am a therapist) is that it lacked empathy toward people who have had some serious trauma. Rape, abandonment, crisis, etc. And I personally felt offended by this. Please don’t take lightly this “self-esteem” issue… because it’s real. So real that we have to sit in rooms with real people, who really want to end their lives. Unfortunately, working in a secular agency, I am unable to direct people to the real answer, which is Jesus Christ. But that will not stop me from being present with them and help them to hold on to something, anything… help them to see that there is value in them, even if they can’t fully understand it.

    • Summer White

      Hi Sara! We recently spent well over an hour discussing our position on what the hope for victims of abuse has been. We did not intend in this discussion to go back to that previous discussion since we covered it at length. This episode is aimed towards the daily failure of most of us to look to Christ for our worth. If you’re interested in our position on abuse and victims, you can listen here:

  3. Michelle

    This was such a great episode and really tugged at my heartstrings because it is just so relevant.
    I am sharing this podcast with the women’s ministry that I am a part of (Karis) in hopes that they may be as encouraged as I am.

  4. Sheri Powers

    Ack! I think it’s rude to wear shoes in someone else’s house! Rude! haha.. thanks, good episode, just wanted to share that!

  5. Caleb

    Hey y’all! Thanks for the insightful episode. It is surely helpful for the church today, and me personally. I was reading 2 Corinthians this morning and came across a passage that may contribute to this conversation.

    “As it is, I rejoice, not because you were grieved, but because you were grieved into repenting. For you felt a godly grief, so that you suffered no loss through us. For godly grief produces a repentance that leads to salvation without regret, whereas worldly grief produces death. For see what earnestness this godly grief has produced in you, but also what eagerness to clear yourselves, what indignation, what fear, what longing, what zeal, what punishment! At every point you have proved yourselves innocent in the matter. ”

    • 2 Corinthians 7:9-11

    Godly grief produces repentance, worldly grief produces death!

    Thanks for all y’all do. Keep up the good work!

  6. Sharon

    Hello… I’m not sure why but I’ve been having difficulty loading Sheologians episodes for a while. It took hours upon hours to load and/or download, and this one can’t even load in full. The time bar says there’s only 2:30 minutes of content, and I keep on failing to download the episode. Is there any alternative way I can access Sheologians content? Thanks.

  7. Lacy

    Summer, if you would just wear your shoes in the house, you wouldn’t stub your toes on your amazing kitchen chairs! ? Keep up the good work, ladies!


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